Emmanuel 6:2:15

In 2010
You were 24,
Somehow, Its 2016,
and you would have turned 30 today.
I'm 24, wondering how this world is so dirty...

Even when I craved a piece of your peace,
I was holding onto four living.
so  it slowly dawned on me,
I couldn't drown in my sorrow
to join your peace.

Every Christmas gone by
brought thoughts of how
You carried me &
The world dropped you.

I tried to remember the voice that taught me to cook,
the face of the only man who ever protected me,
the hugs of my brother who taught me who I wanted to be.
as I thought "Lucky me".


These last six years my mind has kept an atlas
of each place I've ever been with you.
Every experience we've been through
so every time I'm sad I open up a memory,
like a child opening an advent card excited for whats within.
but still finding it hard within.


Its taken me not 1 or 2
but SIX whole years before I could write your name,
and tears still fall,
not because of fear
or my world feeling small.
But because finally,
Finally I know how to stand tall
with the echo of your last words to me.

"I Love you & I'll call you in the morning."

While the sun has risen 2268 times,
I've been fighting to be better for you,
never bitter even when the world isn't true.

Memories of going through your wallet,
when picking out your funeral suit and seeing
Psalm 30:5
scribbled on a paper & tucked away,
I've been keeping it close to my heart
fighting to get through another day.
learning that survival is art.

Knowing

I Love You & I'll see you in the morning...


Cultivate



We make a life altering decision every day upon opening our eyes, automatically assuming we know our life’s outcome. Thinking we instantly know when things will be great or terrible. but the truth is we don’t KNOW, we decide.

Each time our alarm rings and reminding us that we’ve been blessed with another day, is when we have the most power to pave our path.  Some people wake up at 7AM but don’t make it to 7PM. If they were asked their one regret, they would probably say they wish they smiled, laughed and love so much more. 

Life becomes much clearer when you open your eyes to the realisation that, we can make each day of our life a happy one, doing everything within our power to push past the ton of negativity trying to weigh us down. Be our own Clarke Kent and save the day, because when all is said and done our story adds substance to someone else’s life, encouraging them not to give in to the struggle. 

“They” tell us to live a little,  what if we woke up each day and decided to live a lot. Woke up with a smile and said thank you for a new day and affirmed ourselves of how worthy we are. Stop and just breath, realise that life will always be worth living once we accept we have a say in the outcome based on how we react to things and decisions we make regarding issues we dislike. Life is in our own hands and even the little decisions matter. Not just for ourselves but for those around us.

“We often take for granted the very things that deserve our gratitude” -Cynthia Ozick

Learn to explore your passion and find your purpose, while cultivating your gift. Pour  out gratitude and love into others but don’t empty yourself trying to fill them up.   Watch who you tribe with, because only hurt people hurt people and those who love themselves will love you. Give out more love than you get, never expecting something in return.

 Be a better person every day competing with who you were the day before. Be consistent with self affirmation, consistent with gratitude and shower yourself with immence love. The world can never have another you, but it won’t love you unless you do! 

The issues of life may be hard to tackle but remember! the things that troubled you at 8 or 18 won’t trouble you at 28 and the things at 28 won’t trouble you at 38 because life is ever evolving, you’re ever growing and you can either ride this rollercoaster and come out braver or get off sick. Trauma is trauma no matter when or how it decides to swiftly stroll into your life but you have the ability to shape the bigger picture by applying gratitude to the fine print. Its in the little details within the big picture that humility, gratitude and happiness reside. 

"None of us are getting out of here alive, so please stop treating yourself like an after thought. Eat the delicious food. Walk in the sunshine. Jump in the ocean. Say the truth that you’re carrying in your heart like hidden treasure. Be silly. Be kind. Be weird. There’s no time for anything else."  Christopher Walken

Just know your mind is like an empty garden and if you don’t fill those areas with things you actually want to grow then weeds are going to grow there. So if you’re not filling your mind with the beliefs and thoughts that you want to become your reality, thats when negativity and things you don’t want creep in and start to grounding their roots. ask yourself what grows in your garden? what are you feeding your mind, body, and soul each and every day; does it nourish you? Are you leaving people better than you found them?  If the answers to those questions are negative, take a deep breath and STOP sabotaging your success - you will convince yourself of what you are and are not capable of. You and your mindset are the ONLY determining factor. You'll either find a way, or find an excuse. Always remember that somewhere out there someone is looking for exactly what you have to offer.






Constant Gratitude


We make a life altering decision every day upon opening our eyes, automatically thinking we know the day’s outcome, that things will either be good, bad or great. but the truth is we don’t know, we decide.

Each time our alarm rings and reminds us that we’ve been blessed with another day, is when we have the most power to pave our path. See some people wake up at 7AM but don’t make it to 7PM., mostly not by choice but if asked they would probably choose to smile, laugh and love so much more.

Life becomes much clearer when you open your eyes to the realisation that, we can make each day of our life a happy one, doing everything within our power to overlook the ton of negativity trying to weigh us down.

be our own superhero and save our own day, because when all is said and done our story adds substance to someone else’s life, encouraging them not to give in to the struggle. 

“They” will tell us to live a little but what if we woke up each day and decided to live a lot. wake up with a smile and say thank you for a new day, have a shower and affirmed ourselves of how worthy we are, followed by our favourite breakfast and positive vibes. Stop and just breath, realise that life will always be worth living once we accept OUR life is in our own hands and even the little decisions matter.

“We often take for granted the very things that deserve our gratitude” -Cynthia Ozick

Explore your passion, find your purpose and love others but don’t empty yourself trying to fill them up. give out more love than you get but never expect it in return. be a better person every day competing with who you were the day before. be consistent with self affirmation, consistent with gratitude and shower yourself with immence love. The world can never have another you, but it won’t love you unless you do! 

Understand that the things that troubled you 14 or at 18 won’t trouble you at 28 and the things at 28 won’t trouble you at 38 because life is ever evolving, you’re ever growing and you can either ride this rollercoaster and come out braver or get off sick. Trauma is trauma no matter when it decides to swiftly stroll into your life but you have the ability to shape the bigger picture by applying gratitude to the fine print. Its in the little details within the big picture that humility, gratitude & happiness reside. 

Courage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you cannot practice any other virtue consistently” - Maya Angelou

Your mind is like an empty garden and if you don’t fill those areas with things you actually want to grow then weeds are going to grow there. So if you’re not filling your mind with the beliefs and thoughts that you want to become your reality, thats when negativity and things you don’t want creep in and start to grounding their roots. ask yourself what grows in your garden? what are you feeding your mind, body, and soul each and every day; does it nourish you?  If those answers are negative, take a deep breath and STOP sabotaging your success.

YOU convince yourself what you are and are not capable of. YOU and your mindset are the ONLY determining factor. You'll either find a way, or find an excuse. Triumph or surrender but always remember that somewhere out there someone is looking for exactly what you have to offer.


“You will never be able to escape from your heart. so it is better to listen to what it has to say.” - Paulo Coelho

Your One Precious Life

what do you plan to do with your one precious life?
when you wake up every morning are you excited about your day?
what is your passion?
what drives you to keep waking up?
what would you place on your vision board?
what is your why?
What would you do if you could do it all the time? and last but not least what are you most grateful for? Be fearless when it comes to answering all those questions! Be fearless about life. Hold onto the things you're most grateful for as you pursue your dreams. Remember, 


"a mirror can show you who you are, but a broken mirror can show you a thousand possibilities of what you can be." - unknown


Not everyone is blessed with the opportunity to wake up every morning, dreaming about the life they'd love to live. For those who do get that opportunity, remember, images remain dreams if you're stuck in a maze of procrastination, discouragement and self doubt. 

Learn to eliminate every negative element in your environment, Then tell yourself

 "I deserve it, I deserve it all, I'm coming for it ALL". 

Obstacles may come along the way but they were not meant to destroy us, they were meant to strengthen and empower us. Propelling us forward towards our God-given destiny. Reminding us that our purpose is our own, so we need to hold on to it and pursue  it diligently. Doing something every day that brings us closer to our destiny.

Many of us make the mistake of giving others a mental powerpoint presentation of our goals, waiting for them to buy into our hope with words of affirmation. While we disregard the fact that the fastest way to fail is through words without action. If the vision was for everyone it wouldn't be unique, barely anyone would be passionate about it, its for you and that is why others aren't as passionate as you are. 


"I don't have to prove anything to anyone, I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what i want to say to the world" - Beyonce


You can't lead people into thinking you're fearless, if you don't believe in yourself enough to take a leap of faith. Its known that, "fearless" does not mean the absence of fear, its meaning lies in the essence of having fear but leaping forward into faith regardless. Push past the expectations of everyone on the outside and start to self affirm yourself back onto the road less travelled. Ignore the haters and the negativity, just do your thing because thoughts become things & nobody cares until everybody cares.

No one can give you whats already yours. You are what you're hungry for. Everything you crave is what you are. You wouldn't crave love if you're not a lover, wouldn't crave giving if you're not a giver and certainly wouldn't crave affirmation if you aren't affirming others, give it all to yourself. Sometimes we need to hold back from freely letting people to withdraw from our life if they are never around when we need a deposit. Acknowledge that sometimes all the care you give out so freely needs to be directed at yourself and used to build YOU up.  People will make you feel bad for wanting what you want but the fact you desire it is just proof that you are it.


 One day you'll be proud when you can confidently say you paved your own path. After all Robert frost did say; 

"I took the one less travelled and that made all the difference".



When you win I win.

When you win I win.
I tap into that little seed of faith
you've sown and watered,
so I can sow my own seeds and water.

When you win I win.
your success reminds me of my personal aspirations and
 how much harder I need to work
because the end goal isn't riches
but the lesson achievement teaches.

See.you.win.I.win
because your dreams aren't a party for one.
Just Like the sun, You Shine
Loud cheers and tears.
as you walk across that graduation stage.
walk up that aisle in a white gown or
take your first steps towards recovery.
You're succeeding but you're not done.
I win.

Because you show me
and
others like me
it CAN be done.

So when you win I win.
when your feet hit the peddle
and you get transported to a future that surpasses your past.
I win.

When you win I win
as you drop to your knees
and put your hands together
giving thanks so fast.
I win

Because I'm reminded that the Big Man upstairs saw my location
 and connected it to a glorious destination,
As he whispered to my heart
" darling Jeremiah 29:11"
and even before I can reach where I wish to be,
 I'm reminded to pray for where I am.

When you win I win
because i know,
before you die,
you can introduce yourself
to yourself
to your world
and to the world

Head held up
posture of a warrior
stepping on your struggle
as it elevates you to your success
When you win I win

Play it all back like a movie
slay life as you're moving

When you win I win

I tell myself, just put your hand in the hat
and pick out the story you're ready to share with them.
The world listens to inspiration
from struggle and strife

We can all win.

Peel each layer
Then slowly heal each layer




{Side note. A poem to women}
#BlackLivesMatter